[Review] I have made it.

 

Finally, I was judged to be completely cured after the long journey of 2 years and 11 months. I thought I still had a long way to go, so I feel a little surprised.

I had never thought I could be completely cured. I was diagnosed for cancer and my husband left home. I lost the will to live and just wanted to die. Only those who had the same experience will understand what it is like. 

Then, I happened to watch one of Mr. Kim’s Youtube videos. I still think that taking Mind Training was the best choice I have ever made. The treatment process was not easy. Doing the tasks was difficult and symptoms recurred. I repeated becoming comfortable and then having pain again. 

Then, I began to feel moved and grateful without a specific reason. The world stays as it is, but I have changed. I used to be indecisive and dependent, and suppress myself. Now, I can express what I feel and say ‘No’ when I don’t want. I feel confident that I can deal with stress. My health has improved. Everything is fine. I still have a lot to learn, but I believe in myself and can judge and decide for myself. I will live happily with my child. 

I want to thank Mr. Kim and all the staff at KIP for teaching me what true happiness is. 

 https://youtu.be/2tDMahWG784

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[Mother Therapy] How to help your adult children overcome a difficult time.

 

     Parents want to help their children even when children become adults. Parents who identify themselves with children may even perceive children's difficulties as their own. They may try to give advice to their children but it doesn't seem to help children that much. Then, what can you do?

     First of all, parents must understand that children have their own thought standards from their unique life experiences. Parents also have their own thought standards from their unique life experiences. Thought standards of parents' and children's are necessarily different, so parents' well intended advice may not help children overcome the difficulties. It is important to admit that adult children are completely independent and separate human beings from parents even though they were reared by parents for almost 20 years. 

      All human beings go through difficulties in relationships when people's thought standards conflict in relationships. Especially, when you get immersed in your own thought, you are highly likely to develop distorted ideas. When negative ideas become your thought standards, you will perceive and judge everything based on the distorted and negative thought standards. When your children already have developed distorted thought standards, your loving care and advice may be perceived as a negative one, which will only make your relationship with children worsen. 

     It is not parents' advice or guidance that can help adult children who are going through a difficult time. It is to provide an environment where they can overcome their difficulties on their own. That is, parents can help children have stable psychology instead of providing specific advice on what to do. When we can think and judge in the right way based on healthy psychology, we can view our problems objectively with reason. Then, we can also make use of good advice from other people including parents. Unstable psychology only leads to growing stress and wounds in anyone. 

                                                https://youtu.be/SMO115YM2ks

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                      on child's psychological problem

                              Mother Therapy : https://www.mothertherapy.net/ 

[Infidelity Therapy] Getting a divorce upon discovering husband infidelity

 

      Many women choose to get a divorce upon discovering husband infidelity. They would not sacrifice themselves to maintain marriage relationship. They would choose to give up on marriage and family instead of suffering from pain of husband infidelity. They cannot think about their family and children in such a painful situation. 

     In addition, there are many so called experts who encourage lawsuits and divorce. They say that the husband and the adulteress in infidelity must be punished through lawsuits and divorce and the victimized spouse must become happy as an individual. Then, the wives do not even make efforts to restore family and marriage, and go straight to filing lawsuits and getting a divorce destroying family and marriage in their own hands.        

     Many people suffer from stress and wounds from difficult relationships and choose to sever relationships and only pursue happiness as an individual. They choose to avoid and stay in comfort instead of overcoming stress and wounds and pursuing being happy together in relationships. However, humans are social beings by nature and it is hard for anyone to live without forming relationships with other people. 

     It is imperative that wives who suffer from husband infidelity must treat post traumatic stress before anything and restore happiness ability. We may be able to live in comfort but we cannot live in happiness without sharing happiness with other people. When you destroy human relationships, you will naturally live a destructive life then on. 

     It is understandable that wives who suffer from post traumatic stress due to husband infidelity cannot think with reason since the pain is simply excruciating and choose to get a divorce since they cannot stand the situation. Many of them regret getting a divorce hurriedly after they find that their life and their children's life were irrecoverably damaged.      Then, they necessarily develop self-blame, other-blame, or dependency. The most dangerous of them is developing dependency. People who develop dependency avoid and discard all their right and responsibility. They give up on their own right for happiness.          

     Whether a wife who suffers from post traumatic stress due to husband infidelity will live happily or unhappily is decided by whether she makes a right kind of effort or not for restoring happiness. It is not to say that wives in pain and suffering should suppress themselves and sacrifice themselves. It is rather to say that they should restore happiness in a true sense. The treatment program at KIP guides you to find the right path to happiness on your own.

                                                               https://youtu.be/W4scswLECJ8

                                         

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

[Infidelity Therapy] A spouse in infidelity does not develop post traumatic stress upon discovering spouse infidelity.

 

      Many people ask if a spouse who is committing infidelity also develops post traumatic stress upon the discovery of spouse infidelity. A man who is committing infidelity will not develop post traumatic stress when he discovers that his wife is also committing infidelity. The same applies to a woman who is committing infidelity. 

     People who are committing infidelity have developed relationship addiction, which is an advanced condition of psychological disorder. Their psychological condition deteriorates at a fast rate when the discover their spouse is also committing infidelity, but they do not develop post traumatic stress. They also get stressed and wounded by spouse infidelity, which aggravates their psychological disorder. Still, they don't develop post traumatic stress since their condition has already deteriorated enough. 

     People who have post traumatic stress turn everything they perceive, remember, and express into fake wounds. They recognize excruciating pain at first, and then, they feel more and more comfortable developing confidence and seeking pleasure. They develop problems in habits of psychology, with which fake wounds continue to be activated.  

     Recognizing excruciating pain indicates that problems of habits of psychology have not developed yet, and you still have an opportunity to treat your psychological condition.      Post traumatic stress develops only when a person who has normal psychology discovers spouse infidelity. All the experiences in life turn into wounds and you feel that the whole life is denied. 

     On the other hand, people who are already committing infidelity and have relationship addiction do not develop post traumatic stress. They may feel stressed and wounded when their partner of infidelity sees other partners since they cannot get the attention and response they need. They may develop anxiety since they don't have the object for relieving their obsession or stress and wounds, but they just need to find another partner of infidelity. Their psychological condition deteriorates at a fast rate, but they never develop post traumatic stress. 

     People in infidelity already have their psychology operate in abnormal ways, so they don't develop post traumatic stress, with which all life experiences turn into stress and wounds at one blow. However, their condition deteriorates at a fast rate due to the intense stress and severe wounds that suddenly struck them. 

     They are likely to think that it is a good opportunity to end the marriage relationship without recognizing much pain. Some people even perceive the spouse's behaviors as sexual responses and take advantage of the spouse for sexual pleasure. These people cannot but destroy all human relationships as if they spread a contagious disease. Please, keep in mind that relationship addiction and post traumatic stress can destroy all aspects of human life with dire consequences when they are neglected and not properly treated. 

https://youtu.be/gq5hiJ-TbFQ

                                    

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

[Review] Walking in thought

 

I was living a dull, flat, and lifeless life. 

I spent a few comfortable and lazy winters and springs.​

Then, a few years ago, I don't remember exactly when. 

All the wounds piled up inside me fell on me at once like a snowbank 

and erased me without even leaving a trace. 

My foolish thoughts locked me up and tortured me inside the wall of ice. 

I was completely cut off from the outside world.

Then, someday I accidentally watched the video made by KIP. 

I paid for the expense of treatment on loan since the treatment method seemed so logical and effective. 

I was desperate to find myself back. 

I wasted one year idling, and then, I gathered up my will for my children. 

I began to study taking notes on a notebook. 

Five pens I used up for writing in five months became my medicine. 

I eat better and my sexuality is stabilized, but symptoms recur sometimes. 

Recurrence and stability come and go, but I keep doing the tasks.

I often feel comfortable enough to fall asleep listening to the training recording.

I can face my inner self now. 

I feel sorry and grateful to myself.

Now, I have more desire and more passion. 

At first, I wished that I could only eat. 

Then, I wished that I could only sleep. 

I wished that I could only stabilize my sexuality.

My condition has definitely improved, 

but I know I have come only half the way. 

I write this review to remember my first intention and keep up with my will and effort. 

https://youtu.be/R1vrRzxsZd8

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[Review] Looking back on my life

I look back on my life. I used to insist on my own standards for everything without trying to understand other people's thoughts and feelings. I guess I was too self-centered. I justified myself using violence, avoidance, or severance of relationships as means to get out of stress.

My habits long held from the past inflicted pain on my family after I got married. I blamed myself and developed dependency on knowledge and information I could get. Both my body and mind became ill.

I make efforts not to block or avoid, but to overcome stress while I am taking the treatment program. I can see change in myself through my family. I will keep making efforts for myself and my family. 

https://youtu.be/m4FxfPyHwDw

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[Infidelity Therapy] How the victim of spouse infidelity becomes a perpetrator.

Post traumatic stress develops upon experiencing traumatic incident. Post traumatic stress makes the victim develop fake wounds making all the life experiences felt as negative memories. They victim develops wounds upon everything perceived, remembered, and expressed, and develops problems in habits of psychology such as psychological disorders and psychosis.

The victimized spouses suffer from excruciating pain when all life experiences become fake wounds. When fake wounds develop into real wounds in mimind and problems of habits of psychology develop, the victimized spouses feel comfort temporarily and then the condition progresses into severe psychological disorders, which make them pursue pleasure.

Feeling comfort without proper treatment after you suffer from excruciating pain indicates that your condition has deteriorated. It keeps deteriorating for the who life time causing diverse psychological problems. When post traumatic stress is not properly treated, it necessarily cause unhappy or destructive life. 

Many so called experts guides victimized spouses to aggravate their condition and become a perpetrator instead of treating properly. Some may encourage victims to live a destructive life for their own profit, and many victims fall for the deception and become perpetrators themselves. Indeed, we are in a serious situation. 

Post traumatic stress can occur due to spouse infidelity, sudden loss of loved ones, rape, collapse of values of life, an accident, an aftereffect of illness. When post traumatic stress is not properly treated, you will necessarily develop a psychological disorder, which will develop into a severe psychological disorder and then, to a psychosis. Then, you do not suffer from pain but you feel comfort, pleasure living as a perpetrator. 

When you suffer from post traumatic stress upon the discovery of spouse infidelity, there are three different paths your life can take. 

1. A Happy life

You can live a happy life by treating your condition, restoring happiness ability, and building habits of wound treatment by taking KIP Treatment Program.

2. An unhappy life (Stay as a victim)

You may give up on your life, sacrifice and devote yourself to other people, and bear the pain of post traumatic stress. You are unhappy but you do not harm other people. 

3. A destructive life (become a perpetrator)

You become to live only for your own comfort and pleasure. You harm other people to obtain comfort and pleasure and justify yourself mistaking destruction for happiness. 

The victimized spouse goes through the following three stages to become a perpetrator.      

Stage 1 : Make efforts to get out of pain of post traumatic stress

You get immersed into coping with the issue of spouse infidelity through law suits, divorce, and counseling, and form relationships for your comfort. You may develop a severe psychological disorder.

Stage 2 : Make efforts to gain confidence and pleasure

You become to develop dependency and obsession on a specific object, and form relationships for your confidence and pleasure. You may develop relationship addiction, which is a severe psychological disorder. You may also develop intermittent explosive disorder or hysteria. You begin to harm other people for your pleasure. 

Stage 3 : Make efforts to damage other people for your profit and satisfaction. 

You begin to attack people, display rage, and commit crimes pursuing pleasure, and form relationships the suit your goal. Intermittent explosive disorder or hysteria may progress into psychosis, which is manifested as psychopath or sociopath. You begin to feel happy when others are suffering from pain. 

When you have post traumatic stress and don't treat the condition properly, you may live an unhappy life as a victim, or live as a perpetrator inflicting damage on others. This is due course for anyone who develops post traumatic stress. Especially, you are likely to harm close people including your spouse, children, family, and friends. Then, you may also harm anyone how happen to be around you.

Post traumatic stress can cause dire consequences in your life. You must understand that your condition deteriorates as time passes destroying your life and others' lives in the end. You must restore happiness ability by treating the condition in the right way before it's too late. KIP Treatment Program offers you the right way to treat yourself on your own to restore health and happiness in a true sense. 

https://youtu.be/eGbBsg9znEY

                                       

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

[Mother Therapy] Children's right & parents' responsibility

 

Parents cannot but face difficulties in the process of raising children. All parents do their best, but when they find child rearing too hard, they give up and let children do whatever they want and take responsibility. However, it is not right for parents to have children take responsibility and not care about them. 

Parents must let children decide for themselves when children become adults, but children who are minors and in the process of forming self-identity through trials and errors cannot and should not take responsibility for themselves. Minors have only the right to be protected and reared by adults, and they should be able to prepare themselves for pursuing self-actualization as adults in the future. They will and must take responsibility when they become adults and pursue self-actualization. Parents who make children take responsibility are neglecting their duty as parents. 

Minors have the right to be happy under the protection of parents and parents have the responsibility to protect children. When parents have their own psychological problems, they lose the perspective that views children's growth process as it is and they perceive it as problems. Some parents even blame children for their own problems. They think that they are having a difficult time because their children have problems.         

For example, when a teenager displays rebellious and aggressive behaviors, parents may think that they have not changed but the child has peculiar personality traits or some problems unrelated with parents. They may think that parenting is too difficult and they are unhappy because of their child. Personality is not good or bad in itself. Any personality trait can be manifested positively or negatively depending on the situation or the view point. 

It is usually the unstable environment provided by parents who have their own problems that negatively affect children, which in turn makes children display diverse behavioral and psychological problems. Some children may express their distress outwardly by being rebellious or aggressive, and others may suppress their negative emotions. Either way, children's psychology cannot develop in a healthy way when parents have psychological problems. 

Parents affect children greatly with no exception. Especially, parents' emotional state is delivered to children without being filtered. You should never discard your duty of protecting children and taking responsibility for their healthy growth. You should never make children take responsibility for their growth. 

https://youtu.be/VcE4soubPiY

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                              Mother Therapy : https://www.mothertherapy.net/ 

[Infidelity Therapy] Can you overcome infidelity with religion?

 

[Infidelity Therapy] The difference between religious activities and proper treatment when suffering from spouse infidelity 

Some people get confused between religious activities and proper treatment. For example, they would ask, “If shouldn't develop dependency on religion, can't I go to church, read the Bible, or pray while I am taking the treatment program?” 

Of course you can do all of them. However, you must not use religion to avoid pain and find temporary comfort justifying yourself. Then, you are more likely to aggravate post traumatic stress instead of properly treating it. 

Developing dependency on religion is not living a healthy life of faith. You cannot and should not cover up your problems of habits of psychology with religion. As you treat post traumatic stress properly, you will be able to consolidate your religious beliefs. Then, your religious activities can be beneficial for your health and happiness in a true sense. However, when you go to church to meet people and share wounds with them forming personal relationships, you can be put in danger of destroying yourself and others. In that case, you are going to church not for the life of faith but for getting attention and consolation from people. 

Religion can be distorted when humans perceive and operate it in a distorted way. The idea that any type of adoption of religion is legitimate and divine is dangerous. Human mind has the mechanism of its operation, and problems necessarily develop in habits of psychology when it is operated in distorted ways. You can restore healthy psychology only when you accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology, and make efforts accordingly. 

You may think that you can overcome post traumatic stress only with your devotion to religion since your pain and suffering go beyond human capabilities. Indeed, the pain and suffering of post traumatic stress is excruciating enough to make you experience hell on earth. However, depending on religion without proper treatment leads you to seek only comfort with self-justification. 

When treat your condition in a proper way, you can perceive everything and pursue religion in the right way. Restoring your psychology will help you consolidate you religious belief pursuing health and happiness in a true sense. Then, you can also lead a healthy and happy life of faith.

It is recommended that you go to church, read the Bible, and pray with a true heart of faith without developing dependency on relationships with people. It can actually expedite your treatment process. They are considered as healthy religious activities that positively affect you without depending on relationships with people, and they will expedite the process of recovery from post traumatic stress. 

Only praying day and night without making efforts for treatment in the right way, it is likened to asking your god to take care of everything and you doing nothing. It is not your god but you yourself who must make efforts to restore happiness ability. Of course, praying everyday for courage and power along with making efforts and gathering up your will to treat post traumatic stress will help you go in the right direction and at a faster rate. 

     https://youtu.be/U4zhfIbpYaU

                                         

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

[Infidelity Therapy] You may not have an opportunity to treat post traumatic stress later.

Many people think that it would not be too late to treat post traumatic stress of the victimized spouse after they solve practical problems of spouse infidelity such as lawsuits and divorce. They may feel that it is urgent to solve the practical problems of infidelity, and think that their psychological condition will be fine even when they are going trough post traumatic stress.

However, post traumatic stress only deteriorates as time passes without proper treatment. Especially, as you continue to be exposed to infidelity while trying to solve the practical problems of infidelity. Many people neglect their condition for too long and try to treat it only when everything has collapsed. Then, it may be too late to treat post traumatic stress.

When you treat post traumatic stress before trying to solve the problem of spouse infidelity, you can easily address all practical problems related with infidelity protecting yourself and children with happiness ability. In this case, all the practical measures such as lawsuits and divorce contribute to consolidating your happiness. 

People who try to solve practical problems of infidelity first are doing their best to restore happiness in their own ways. However, it results in aggravating post traumatic stress and destroying yourself and children. When post traumatic stress advances to intermittent explosive disorder or hysteria, it is very hard to treat the condition. You may be able to prevent the aggravation through medication, but it is impossible to cure the condition and restore normalcy. 

When spouse infidelity occurs, the most important thing is not to address the practical problems of infidelity, but to treat post traumatic stress of the victimized spouse. Your conscious thought and emotions are completely different depending on whether you have treated post traumatic stress or not. You must treat your post traumatic stress before anything and then, you can give your spouse an opportunity to treat his or her condition of relationship addiction.

When relationship addiction progresses to intermittent explosive disorder or hysteria, the victimized spouse is recommended to get a divorce and then treat post traumatic stress to be able to protect him or herself and children. Of course, it is not easy to treat post traumatic stress and restore happiness. On the other hand, it is very easy to avoid the situation, display rage, and collapse. It is up to you to decide on whatever you do with your life, but it should be kept in mind that taking practical measures to solve problems of infidelity before treating post traumatic stress only leads to collapse.

     You experience pain and suffering at the early stage of post traumatic stress but you feel comfortable as the condition progresses further, which means that your mind is being destroyed and other people begin to suffer in the relationship with you. As your condition deteriorates, all your relationships with people are affected negatively. You must put priority on restoring healthy psychology and take the opportunity to treat post traumatic stress when you can. 

                                                                    https://youtu.be/Oh-z8mYIqRI

                              

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)  

[Review] The most important thing in life

From time to time, I think about moments I was in such pain before I started the treatment program. I was completely lost for what was going on, I was in fear, I felt like I was expelled, I wished I was in a dream, and I desperately wanted somebody to save me. I was in pain every moment of the day and the night.

I want to hug myself tight if I went back to the time. I would encourage myself and say that I would get over the suffering. I would tell myself that it was not my fault.      At first, I was looking to everyone for saving me. I could have fallen for anything if I had not started the treatment program.

I was in despair many times even during the treatment. I thought what I was going through was beyond the capability of this program. Then, I thought I was cured and I began to neglect therapeutic tasks about a year after I began the treatment. At that time, I put priority on other things than on treating myself. 

I have realized that myself is the most important thing in my life, so treating myself is also more important than anything else. I promise myself that I will focus on the treatment. 

 https://youtu.be/rwFhPlAo6T8

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[Infidelity Therapy] The optimal timing of lawsuits, divorce, and solutions

 

It may be necessary to file a lawsuit, get a divorce, or address practical issues when spouse infidelity is discovered. However, every measure should be taken at a right time. Many people who suffer from spouse infidelity do not wait for the right time and go ahead for lawsuits, a divorce, or solutions, being engulfed by rage and despair. Then, the victimized spouse and children should bear the unfortunate result that damages their life. 

1. Getting a divorce upon the discovery of spouse infidelity

You may think that getting a divorce is only natural when spouse infidelity is discovered. However, your life will be destroyed when you just get a divorce without treating wounds from marriage life and spouse infidelity, which causes post traumatic stress. The psychology of compensation is likely to be activated after a divorce, which may lead you to pursue pleasurable life losing the power of control. 

You may be convinced that you are not a pleasure seeker at all, but your damaged psychology makes you think and act in the opposite ways. Then, you may justify yourself saying that you couldn't help it because of this and that. Treating post traumatic stress must precede getting a divorce. You also need to fully prepare yourself before getting a divorce. Interestingly, in many cases, the victimized spouse loses the idea of getting a divorce after they recover from rage and resentment caused by post traumatic stress. 

2. Filing a lawsuit upon the discovery of spouse infidelity

It may be necessary to file a lawsuit against the adulterer or the adulteress. However, when you proceed with lawsuits without treating post traumatic stress, post traumatic stress deteriorates rapidly in the process of lawsuits. Focusing on lawsuits is equivalent to focusing on rage and revenge as well as on the spouse in infidelity. If you focus on thinking about spouse infidelity when you should actually try not to retrieve the incident, psychological wounds increase exponentially.

Differently from what many people think, it is almost impossible to recover marriage relationship after lawsuits. Lawsuits consolidate the idea that the spouse in infidelity as well as the adulterer or the adulteress is a perpetrator. It is as if you destroyed your life with your own hands even if you win the lawsuit. On the other hand, when you file lawsuits after you treat post traumatic stress and build happiness ability, you can proceed with lawsuits without losing the control of your life and without damaging yourself and your children. 

3. Addressing practical issues upon the discovery of spouse infidelity

The spouse in infidelity has already destroyed marriage relationship. No practical measure can restore marriage relationship, and such measures can only destroy marriage relationship at a faster rate. Both trying to be nice to the spouse or trying to hurt the spouse are examples of taking practical measures. The spouse in infidelity may act irrationally or violently upon the slightest trigger of stress and wounds since he or she has developed relationship addiction that destroys all human relationship. 

People in relationship addiction tend to have relationships only among themselves. Any practical measure taken by the spouse who has post traumatic stress induces intense stress and severe wounds in the spouse in infidelity, which in turn gives them more excuses to destroy marriage relationship. If you want to keep even the slightest chance to restore marriage relationship, it is recommended that you shouldn't address or solve practical issues just yet. Looking for solutions should wait until you treat post traumatic stress and build happiness ability. Otherwise, it is like pouring water in a sieve. 

4. Taking advice or counseling upon the discovery of spouse infidelity

Not many people understand the nature of infidelity. Most advice and counseling including professional counseling don't help you restore happiness and marriage relationship. You may feel comfortable temporarily from retrieving your stress and wounds and aggravating post traumatic stress while taking advice and counseling. When you are consoled and empathized by the counselor about your thoughts and feelings, you become to justify your rage and despair and turn fake wounds into real wounds, blurring the fundamental issues and developing dependency on the person who consoles and empathizes with you. 

You can take other people's advice and counseling after you treat post traumatic stress, remove fake wounds, and take the full control of your life. Then, you can decide on the right direction of your life on your own. Otherwise, post traumatic stress only deteriorates as you take more advice and more counseling. Then, you will end up living your life not by your own will but by other people's will. 

It is the condition of post traumatic stress that gets in your way whatever you do upon the discovery of spouse infidelity. You can and must file lawsuits, get a divorce, or address practical issues if necessary for you own happiness. However, you will end up destroying your life and your children's life when all your actions are based on post traumatic stress. You will be able to achieve happiness for yourself and your children whatever you do after you treat post traumatic stress and build happiness ability. 

https://youtu.be/t9jb9O0xd1w

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)  

[Mother Therapy] I am angry at myself for losing my temper at my children

Q. I am a working mother who is raising a boy and a girl. My boy has tic disorder and has been taking psychology therapy for quite a long time. I wonder whether he has developed tic disorder since I was always working outside home ever since he was very young. Especially, I can't seem to control my temper when my children quarrel with each other and they make a fuss about what to wear for school in the morning. I didn't want to become like my own mother, who complained and fretted a lot to children, so I even majored in psychology at college. I feel frustrated that I am becoming like my mother. 

​A. Parents do not necessarily have to make generous and controlled expressions all the time toward children. Parents can get angry at children sometimes. Anger should not be denied only as a negative emotion, and it just shows that your psychology is unstable. If you expressed anger toward children in spite of yourself, you should apologize and explain why you were so angry even when children are very young. If you just keep expressing anger and do not take any actions of apology and explanation, children become just the objects you vent your anger on. 

Some mothers blame themselves when their children have problems. It is very difficult for you to manage child rearing and working on your career simultaneously, and you or any mother can't be a perfect mother. You shouldn't blame yourself for your child's tic disorder since it didn't happen because you had a career. 

All human beings, especially women, have wounds in mimind. Seemingly perfect parents cannot avoid stress and wounds completely. It causes no problem when stress and wounds are properly healed and treated as they occur, but it causes problems when they are accumulated and suppressed. This will affect the closest relationships most negatively. That is, mother's unstable psychology, not expressing anger itself, negatively affects children. 

You said you didn't want to become like your own mother, who complained and fretted a lot. The fact is that your mother never wanted to become an irritable and peevish mother. She was a very sweet mother at first, but she changed as her psychological condition deteriorated as she got stressed and wounded more and more.      

As you accurately understand your psychological condition, you can easily address the fundamental issues. As you stabilize your psychology, you will understand your mother and stop being irritable and peevish even when children make a fuss every day. The most important thing is to examine your own condition of the body and the mind.

https://youtu.be/V7nxMjdeURU

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 on child's psychological problem

                              Mother Therapy : https://www.mothertherapy.net/ 

[Infidelity Therapy] It is the husband's fault to commit husband infidelity, but it is the wife's fault to destroy herself and children.

It is the husband's fault to commit infidelity. He has developed relationship addiction acutely, which is an advanced condition of a psychological disorder. However, it is the wife's fault to destroy herself and children after she discovers husband infidelity and develops post traumatic stress. It may be the husband's infidelity that caused the wife's post traumatic stress, but the wife can treat post traumatic stress, transform her life to a happy one, and protect herself and children. All her efforts she makes without treating post traumatic stress destroy herself, children, and family. She has to treat herself before she blames the husband and take measures to address the husband's problem. 

When the wife treats her post traumatic stress, she can restore a happy life and protect children regardless of what the husband does. The wife who is in pain must first treat her post traumatic stress and become happy before addressing the husband's problem. Of course, she can ask for compensation and hold him responsible for putting all family members in danger since the wife has protected her children and family after treating her condition. 

If the husband is committing infidelity and the wife is suffering from post traumatic stress, the whole family is in danger of collapse. The wife must treat herself to minimize the time of suffering and prevent the aggravation of the condition to restore happiness of the family. The wife who aggravates her own condition is not entitled to condemn the husband for his wrongdoing. When the wife just keeps blaming the husband for everything and doesn't treat her post traumatic stress, all family members cannot but collapse sooner or later. When husband infidelity occurs, treating the wife's post traumatic stress is much more important than addressing the husband's problem. 

The husband in infidelity has developed a psychological disorder that destroys all human relationships and has lost the ability to protect the family. The protection of the family is absolutely in the wife's hands. When the wife doesn't treat post traumatic stress and try to get even with the husband or punish him, the husband may get stressed immensely and aggravate his condition. When the wife treats post traumatic stress and has the happiness ability, the husband is not stressed by the wife's behaviors. 

The husband in relationship addiction reacts negatively whenever he is stressed in any situation and behaves in ways to destroy human relationships. The wife must leave him alone until she treats post traumatic stress and her behaviors do not induce stress in the husband. It is not to say that the wife must forgive him or just forget about husband infidelity. She must address the husband's problem and help him treat relationship addiction after she stabilizes her own psychology. She is the only one who can give the husband an opportunity to restore happiness. It is impossible to deal with the issue when the wife is in post traumatic stress. 

The wife must take KIP Treatment Program to treat post traumatic stress and restore happiness ability. As the wife attacks the husband and blames him for his wrongdoing without treating her condition, the whole family is destroyed. The wife's decision and her efforts determine the life of herself and children. When everything is destroyed, the wife may blame the husband for her ow behaviors and justify her behaviors. 

It is only the wife who can make a choice for her own life. The wife's life and children's life are determined by the wife's choice. She is the only one who can decide whether she will stay with her husband or leave him. 

https://youtu.be/rfcP6wUK3Vo

  

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

[Infidelity Therapy] You can't just go back to normality as if nothing had happened when you discover spouse infidelity.

 

The discovery of spouse infidelity causes the victimized spouse to develop post traumatic stress. Then, the victimized spouse cannot easily recover as if nothing had happened since post traumatic stress progresses unless properly treated. 

Post traumatic stress progresses for the whole life time unless properly treated. It doesn't go away even if the spouse behaves well and try to think that it will never happen again. It also deteriorates when the victimized spouse try to find evidence of infidelity and take practical measures to cope with the situation. Then, post traumatic stress begins to negatively affect all the relationships including the relationship with children.

As post traumatic stress progresses, victim mentality, perpetrator mentality, and the psychology of compensation also develop, and you will keep trying to satisfy yourself and compensate for what you have lost in order to achieve comfort and pleasure. This type of comfort and pleasure only indicated that your condition has deteriorated. You may justify yourself thinking that you deserve the compensation, give up on recovery, and remove pain to stay comfortable. 

It is only normal and natural to feel emotions of pain and sorrow as well as pleasure happiness since they are all parts of emotions generated by human mind. Removing feelings of pain and sorrow is to destroy them and make them unrecognized in the conscious. Then, you become to justify that living in comfort and pleasure with positive moods in the sensory organs is happiness. It indicates that your condition is as serious as the condition of the spouse in infidelity. 

Whether the spouse is in infidelity is less important than the fact that you have developed post traumatic stress and it will progress unless properly treated. You can't just go back to normality as if nothing had happened. 

Relationship addiction is a psychological disorder that destroys human relationships, love and happiness, and sexuality. People in relationship addiction do not hesitate to destroy any relationship when they are stressed from the relationship justifying their behaviors and blaming the counterparty. They end up destroying their own life in the end.

Relationship addiction also deteriorates for the whole lifetime unless properly treated. When the spouse infidelity is discovered by the victimized spouse, marriage relationship cannot be restored without proper treatment no matter how hard both parties try since both are in the condition of psychological disorder. 

Both post traumatic stress and relationship addiction obstruct the recovery of marriage relationships. Then, what kind of life would you choose? It is imperative that happiness be restored in the right way through Mind Training upon the discovery of spouse infidelity. Otherwise, all the family cannot but live an unhappy life or a destructive life regardless of the conscious intention destroying all human relationships. Especially, children's psychology and life are destroyed along the way. You must restore your own happiness and psychological stability first to protect your children. 

Many people live an unhappy life and a destructive life by their own choice, but justify themselves and blame their spouses who committed infidelity. The spouse in infidelity has destroyed his or her life, and inflicted pain and suffering on you, but he or she has not destroyed your life. You are the only one who can choose the path of your own life. Even at this moment, your post traumatic stress is progressing while you are watching this video. It is time for you to decide on the proper treatment for your life. 

When you justify yourself with the condition of post traumatic stress, you may destroy not only your life but also life of people around you. You may also develop dependency and obsession and live unhappily. It is you yourself who destroy your own mimind and make your life unhappy and destructive. 

 When you discover spouse infidelity, you may suffer from excruciating pain of post traumatic stress and just want to go back to the old days when you were happy. However, it is impossible unless you adequately treat your condition and restore your happiness as an individual first.  

https://youtu.be/Utiu2UMF2xw

    

About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)