12/22/2021

[Husband Infidelity] I cannot forget being insulted by the adulteress and I am considering filing a law suit against her.

 

Q. My husband had an affair one year ago and I cannot forget about the incident where I was insulted by the adulteress. I want to get even with the adulteress for my suffering and humiliation by filing a law suit against her. I have good evidence, her name, and her phone number. She doesn't have a job or a permanent address and doesn't seem to have any money. She also seems to be involved with many men. Will I be able to punish her by a lawsuit?

A. Women with a progressed condition of relationship addiction cannot live without getting men's attention constantly. They will do anything to get attention from men for their whole lifetime. Relationship addiction is divine retribution in and of itself. 

You are in pain and suffering since you have developed post traumatic stress due to husband infidelity. Post traumatic stress transforms all your memories of life into wounds causing excruciating psychological pain. You will continue to suffer from pain regardless of the fact that you were insulted by the adulteress. Post traumatic stress operates in you for your life time unless properly treated and you cannot just remove the painful memories unless you yourself develop relationship addiction, with which you will destroy your life and lives of others. 

You may develop the desire to revenge by filing a lawsuit against the adulteress since you are in such great pain. However, your condition of post traumatic stress gets aggravated more and more as you take practical measures to cope with the situation. You will get even more furious when the adulteress does not seem to be affected by the lawsuit. Moreover,what will be waiting for you after you feel better temporarily by winning a lawsuit? You will begin to attack people around you since you have aggravated your condition of post traumatic stress. 

The adulteress is already suffering from her misfortune since relationship addiction is ruining her life. She mistakes pleasure for happiness and cannot stand even a moment without getting men's attention. She may have started with normal psychology and may have experienced pain and suffering as you did. She ended up living as a human trash since she did not treat her condition and chose to destroy her life. Infidelity caused by relationship addiction has nothing to do with love and it is only a type of psychological disorder, which often times leads to dire consequences in life.

You must prioritize the treatment of your condition above anything. You can do anything to cope with the situation after you restore healthy psychology and build happiness ability. Filing a lawsuit when you are still in post traumatic stress only aggravates both practical situation and psychological condition. 

The painful memory of one year ago will not just disappear even in 10 or 20 years unless you treat yourself properly. Your pain is the signal that you want to recover and restore happiness, not the signal that you need to file a lawsuit.

 About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)

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