What is a successful life?

 

     In order to understand what 'a successful life' is, we should first understand the concept of both 'success' and 'life'. We can say that our life is successful when we have a goal of life and we achieve the goal. Our life is considered to be successful when we are satisfied with our achievement. 'Life' is the accumulation of our experiences incorporating past, present, and future. Therefore, you are considered to have 'a successful life' when you set and achieve your own goal in the process of experiencing past, present, and future. 

     Another point to be noted here is 'achievement'. What 'achievement' means is determined by individuals with their own subjective standards, so success cannot be discussed from other people's viewpoints. Also, the word 'achieve' is usually associated with results, but it can also include the process of pursuing and making efforts for the expected results when we discuss successful life. Some people may think that their life is successful since the process of pursuing success is satisfactory regardless of the result. Others may think that only the result is important regardless of the process. Still others may think that both the process and the result are equally important in measuring the degree of success in life. Which type to choose among the three types can and must be determined only by individuals, and it is meaningless to argue about which is right or wrong. 

     Firstly, there are people who consider the process of pursuing and making efforts for success in life to be more important than the result. In this case, people feel satisfied with pursuing success itself, then thinking their life is successful. They feel that every moment of their life is important and meaningful and every moment is success in and of itself. Secondly, there are people who consider the result more important than the process. In this case, they do not consider the process of pursuing and making efforts for success important or meaningful in their life. These people cannot feel satisfaction from any activity they take during the path of life and it is simply taken as hard work. The process may be considered as only a means to an end and even something unnecessary. Thirdly, some people consider both the process and the result important and meaningful for their life to be successful. These people may enjoy the process of pursuing and making efforts for success and also consider the result of efforts important. 

     We usually choose one of the types described above to achieve success in life. However, when some people do not take either the process or the result important in their life, it indicates that they have no purpose of life, and they may just focus on pleasure moment by moment. They do not have the concept of 'a successful life' inside them, so it is irrelevant to discuss this case here. 

     When people achieve the result of success in life at young age without making great efforts, they may have to live being enslaved to the result the already have. They do not know how to pursue and make efforts for success, and may become obsessed with the result since, for them, only having the result now is important. People who aim for getting rich quick through speculation or gambling belong to this category.   

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     Also, men and women are different in setting goals and proceeding to achieve a successful life. Women are designed and have the ability to pursue meanings of life generating feelings of comfort and happiness along with values of life generating passion for social success. When women can pursue values of life based on meanings of life, they have a higher probability of achieving success in life compared with men, since they can activate greater energy pursuing both meanings and values of life simultaneously. With respect to human beings' pursuit of happiness in life, women can also be considered to have achieved success in life only by understanding the whole spectrum of feelings including joy, anger, pleasure, and sorrow, and maintaining feelings of happiness without pursuing values of life. Thus, when women have comfort and happiness in mind, they tend to neglect pursuing additional success in life for values of life since they are already satisfied.

     Men are designed to pursue only values of life. Men do not and cannot have the concept of success with respect to feelings of happiness and comfort, and they necessarily have to choose and determine the goal and the direction for pursuing values of life. This mechanism explains the phenomenon where men experience fatal conditions when their psychology collapses with respect to the pursuit of values. Even when they choose and determine their goals and directions and make great efforts by themselves, achieving success with values of life is not easy since success with values of life is affected by many external factors and can be achieved only within diverse human relationships. No matter how hard you work for success, you may face all kinds of obstacles and failures associated with people you work with, who naturally pursue their own success in life. 

     It is often said that successful people are lucky ones who accidentally had good opportunities. However, the concept of 'accident' does not apply to success in life. We may come across many opportunities during our lifetime, but it is not accidental at all for us to recognize opportunities as opportunities and take advantage of them. It is only those who have been always preparing and making efforts for success in life that can take opportunities when they come. Opportunities that accord with your ability necessarily come to you in the process of working for success of life. That is, an opportunity is what is offered to you by some sources only when you are prepared to take the opportunity.

     When you make efforts without having goals, you will not be able to recognize opportunities even when they are right in front of you. You need to have goals that accord with opportunities to be able to recognize them as opportunities. Also, when you have goals but do not make efforts for the goals, you may not be able to recognize and take the right opportunity, either. You need to have goals and continuously make efforts, and understand on which one you put priority for success in life to be able to recognize and take opportunities for the desired effect. These people are called 'people who are prepared for success in life'.

     On the other hand, people who always fail have their own characteristics. Firstly, some people do not have goals and do not know how to proceed with pursuing success of life. Then, they cannot even begin to pursue success in life, which is a failure in and of itself. With this respect, doing nothing and just staying where you are as time keeps passing is considered as a failure. Secondly, some people have goals but do not make efforts to achieve the goals. Of course, it is impossible to achieve anything without making efforts. As described so far, we should not think that failure is something mysterious or abstract. You can clearly and accurately figure out whether you are headed for success or failure in life when you analyze your situation applying the standards explained above. People who blame external factors or consider themselves as being unlucky are the ones who have not thought enough about their goals or have not made enough efforts. 

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