Korea Institute of Psycho-education: [Mother Therapy] Children and teenagers who refuse to go to school

There are times when a child or a teenager doesn't want to go to school or wants to drop out. As a caregiver, you may try to convince the child or the teenager to stay in school or not drop out. In some cases, caregivers may not think it's a big deal to not go to school or drop out, telling them, "It's your life, it's your decision," or "I respect your decision." Others may offer a plan for not going to school or dropping out, or they may simply assume that the child will figure it out.

There are many reasons why children and adolescents may choose not to go to school or drop out. They may not feel the need to do school work, they may be stressed or hurt at school, they may have more fun or interests outside of school, they may have problems with their relationship with their teacher or with their peers, or they may be victims of bullying, verbal abuse, or violence.

These are all signs that a child or adolescent is experiencing trial and error in the formation of psychological habits, or that they have developed problems in the habits of psychology. Children and adolescents try to avoid going to school or drop out in order to feel safe or comfortable.

In this case, the first problem is that the formation of psychological habits may be distorted, and problems in the habits of psychology may develop. This will cause serious problems in the growth process of children and adolescents, and when they become adults and pursue self-actualization, they will have many difficulties in life.

The second problem is that it can cause problems with knowledge education. Acquiring knowledge is a necessary process for higher education and intellectual development, so we must find ways to replace knowledge education in schools so that children and adolescents can continue knowledge education on their own.

The third problem is that children and adolescents give up their rights and are easily exposed to self-actualization as if they were adults. In this case, children and adolescents may be victimized for other people's self-actualization, become perpetrators or victims of crimes, and have everything they have taken advantage of by selfish people.

Then, what can you do if a child or a teenager refuses to school or wants to drop out? First, you need to keep them safe, which means creating an environment where they can't be taken advantage of by others. Second, the primary caregiver needs to rebuild the relationship with the child or the teenager. You need to build a good relationship with the child or the adolescent so that they can trust you and talk to you. The third is to help the child or adolescent understand their rights and responsibilities for self-actualization, which should be understood by children or adolescents, but not taught or imposed upon them.

Fourth, you should help children and teenagers develop habits for healing stress and treating wounds, and help them develop these habits on their own, rather than having caregivers, teachers, or professionals create habits for them. Fifth, you need to help them create habits of problem solving, trial and error, and overcoming challenges. Sixth, you need to help them find good things about school.

By following these six steps in sequence, you can help children and teenagers who refuse to go to school or who want to drop out of school. Not going to school or dropping out may not not a sign of a serious problem, but it's important to know exactly what the benefits and drawbacks are, and what the problems and solutions are.

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