A few days ago, a young mother asked me
for advice about parenting. She, said, “I have a child in kindergarten, and I'm
getting help from my parents for child rearing because I'm working and studying
at the same time. Recently, my mom said to me, "You feel too sorry for
your child when you don't have to. It's not good to coddle children and accept
everything they want." Hearing this from the person closest to me made me
think seriously about my parenting.”
She said that she looked up the parenting
methods of famous people and tried to apply them, and ended up doing the
opposite of what she had done before. But the problem was that she didn't know
if this was the right way either, and she began to ask herself if she should even
continue to work and study, and she was struggling with the question of whether
her parenting was having a bad effect on her child, and whether the parenting
she was doing now was the right way. I think this is an issue every working mother
with young children has. What should we do in this situation?
The first thing to do is to recognize that
it's natural to have confusion and difficulties when you're raising your child.
Raising a child is naturally difficult and challenging because you're
responsible for making sure your child grow up healthy in body and mind, and
even if you're experienced in raising children, it's not the same every time.
Therefore, it's best to think of it as trial and error because you're new to
motherhood and want to do a good job. It's only when you go through this
process of thinking about parenting and trying to figure things out that you
can and will find and create a parenting style that works for you and your
child. It's not something that just "clicks" into place. So it's
important to recognize when you're struggling with parenting that you want to
do a good job of parenting, and then you can take a step back and look at
yourself objectively.
Number two. Take care of your own body and
mind before you look for information about parenting. The mind and body are
connected, and if your body is struggling, your mind is struggling, and if your
mind is struggling, your body is struggling. We've all been there, you're
juggling work, studying, and parenting, and sometimes it's hard on your body,
which may cause your mind to suffer too. When you feel depressed or frustrated,
you are more likely to interpret the same situation in a distorted way. In
other words, your perspective changes depending on your current state of mind.
Therefore, the most important thing is to have a healthy body and mind.
There's a lot of information out there
about parenting. It's not hard to get information about parenting through
various media. If you have a healthy body and stable mind, you're more likely
to look at things objectively, and you'll be able to separate the good from the
bad. Remembering these two points are crucial when you're having doubts or
anxiety about your parenting.
You should understand that you feel
anxious and worried not because you're doing something wrong with your
parenting. Every mother goes through this phase, and you're going to keep having
all kinds of parenting concerns until your child becomes an adult. If you keep
these two points in mind, you will be able to solve the problems one by one
without worrying too much.
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