Q : My husband stubbornly denies his infidelity even though I know all about it. I want to show him the evidence and end this marriage, but the reality is that I would be in economic difficulties after divorce. Should I reveal his infidelity and treat myself? or should I just ignore and live just as now?
A : Everyone, of course, denies his or her infidelity stubbornly because they can have some time to retrieve their wrongdoing. So, if you show him evidence of his infidelity, he would ask you from where you have got the evidence instead of acknowledging his fault.
If your husband has infidelity, that means he has a psychological disorder. Those with psychological disorders tend to evade stress first when stress comes in. So, you must not think that they did wrongdoings but understand that these people with psychological disorders are always like that. You don't need to be wounded. Relationship addiction is not a mental disease but means errors occurred in thinking about human relationships. Thus, instead of distinguishing right and wrong, you need to make a judgment realistically what you would do in this current situation.
If the wife tries to get treatment, that is the same as the husband admits his infidelity; thus, he would pick on her. So, the treatment provided by KIP is considered as pseudo. Also, when it comes to the cost, lots of complaints arise, which causes the situation more difficult for getting the treatment.
There is one more thing that needs to be considered. It is the situation when the husband asks for divorce instead of asking for forgiveness after his infidelity was revealed. Since you would not want this to happen, just don't mind about him and just keep the evidence collected.
Therefore, whether your husband is in an inappropriate relationship with another woman or not, don't mind about it. Treat your rage and wounds first; you can make a decision on how to deal with this situation when you are no longer in pain even when you see him having infidelity.
Do not try hard to have him back at this point. If there is still no change in his behavior and if you think you decide to end your relationship with him even after you are treated, you must cope with the situation cool-headedly.
Korea Institute of Psycho-education : http://www.uip.ac/