10/12/2021

[The psychology of dating Q&A] Do people feel more attracted to partners who have different personality from their own in a romantic relationship?

Yes. People feel more attracted to partners who have different personality than to partners who have similar personality with their own. We see many couples with opposite personalities who maintain passion toward each other and stay together for a long time. A woman who is quiet and passive may feel attracted to a man who is tough and active. This phenomenon results from the unconscious operating in the opposite way from the conscious. 

Many people find their partner attractive due to the difference in personality and become lovers and spouses, but they also break up for the same reason. When a man and a woman have similar personality, they may stay as friends but cannot develop a romantic relationship because they are not attracted to each other. They may feel comfortable to stay together, but cannot generate passion and love toward each other. Anyone who is special to you is highly likely to be someone who is very different from you. 

 About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)  


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