[Infidelity Therapy] A lawsuit against the adulteress, and then what?


     There are many ways for the wife to punish the husband and the adulteress. The easiest way is to publicize the fact of infidelity to humiliate the husband and the adulteress or to file a lawsuit. Filing a lawsuit may look like a cool and rational way to deal with the issue at first. However, if you win the lawsuit and even get compensated financially, would the issue of infidelity solved completely?

      Getting financial compensation through a lawsuit makes you unable to appeal further in any way since your damage is considered to be legally compensated. Filing a lawsuit against the adulteress equates with acknowledging husband infidelity in return for money. 

     The wife may choose the lawsuit as a way of revenge out of indignation but the result is only abjectness. The wife has endorsed husband infidelity for a small sum of money. In addition, getting even with the adulteress by a lawsuit cannot eliminate the wife's rage and distress. Rather, her post traumatic stress deteriorates and rage and distress keep growing everyday.

     As the wife continues suffering from rage and distress, the husband begins to defend himself thinking that he has paid for his infidelity by going through the lawsuit. Both the husband who admitted his wrongdoing and the husband who justified his behaviors begin to be convinced that his wife is the most peculiar person. The wife who still gets enraged even after winning the lawsuit helps justify the husband's infidelity. Even the husband who asked for forgiveness admitting the wrong doing leaves home or demands a divorce. 

     Have you thought about the result of filing a lawsuit? It is an utter mistake to think that you will become free from rage and distress when you win the lawsuit. You may feel better temporarily after the lawsuit, but then, you will face your post traumatic stress that has deteriorated and the worse marriage relationship. The only choice you can make in the face of the overwhelming situation is getting a divorce. 

     Filing a lawsuit must wait until you treat post traumatic stress and restore happiness. Filing a lawsuit when post traumatic stress is deteriorating is to take out the frustration without thinking clearly about what to do next. Please, keep in mind that the result of the hasty action is manifested as your own mind destroyed, marriage relationship severed, and children's psychology ruined. 


About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) 

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