7/10/2024

[Sex & Xes] Men remember sex, but not the partner.

 

Today, we're going to talk about object-specific sexual attraction. You've probably heard people say: "I can't break up with my partner because we are so compatible sexually, or I can't stop thinking about the physical relationship even though I've broken up with him or her." In other words, the sex with someone is so compatible that they want to stay sexually involved even though their minds have moved on.

Neither men nor women understand how this works, so you might think, "Maybe there are just people like that," or "Maybe I haven't met the right person yet," or "Maybe the person I'm seeing right now is just like that!" But technically, this phenomenon doesn't exist in men, and it exists only in women. Let's take a look at how it works.

A man's xesmind will only accept new information that is not in his own xes habits in his xes memory, which is why the saying "the prettiest girl for a man is a new girl" is floating around, and why many men will only save pornography they've seen once and never open it again. Also, a man's xesmind doesn't really care about the partner, but only the realization of sex itself, which means that it's important to express sexuality with words, actions, and facial expressions, and who he has sex with is less important. Of course, men’s mimind distinguishes between women who they love and protect and women who they don't. As motioned many times, what you feel and think is the result of the work of mimind, and the work of xesmind is not felt in the conscious, but only affects the mind.

Can a man, then, be sexually attracted to only one partner? It is impossible. The more sexual information and sexual habits a man has accumulated from a partner, the more his xesmind can no longer sense new sexual information from that partner. Therefore, if you try to apply the concept of sexual attraction limited to a specific partner to a man, you create a self-contradictory proposition that a man can be sexually attracted to a partner only when he no longer feels that partner as a sexual object. 

Of course, this concept of being sexually attracted only to a specific partner doesn't apply to married couples either : it's normal for couples to not feel sexually attracted a lot to each other by the workings of their xesmind and mimind. If men really had a phenomenon of being sexually attracted only to a specific partner that they are accustomed to, the couple would have passionate sex blazing until the day they die. But for men, even if they marry the most beautiful woman in the world, their sexual bliss doesn't last long, because the partner has become a family member that they protect and identify with. 

So why do some men obsess over one woman and say that sex with her is so good because they are so sexually compatible? It's not that they like sex with that woman in particular, but rather that they are addicted to her responses. They have developed a psychological disorder of response addiction where everything she says and does, from everyday life to sex, is perceived as a response and everything feels good. This is called relationship addiction.

This psychological disorder never occurs for their wives, who, by analogy, are the sacred sanctuary, the only place where a psychologically impaired husband can breathe and rest. So no matter how stressed out and fun-loving they are outside, strangely, husbands fall asleep so easily next to their wives. If they don't realize they're tired no matter how much fun activities they have, they are considered to have a psychological disorder, but when they're with their wives, it's not fun, but it's so relaxing. Both husbands and wives misunderstand this phenomenon. They think it's because their love for each other has grown cold.

There's another one. If a man has sex with a woman, and he feels pleasure that he's never experienced before, he doesn't remember the woman herself but he clearly remembers the pleasure of sex that he felt in sex at that time, and because this working of xesmind is recognized only through mimind, he has the illusion that he likes the woman, but what he remembers, at least as far as sex is concerned, is the pleasure of sex, not the partner.

But what about women? Women actually have a phenomenon where they are sexually attracted only to a specific partner. Because women only accept what fits with the sexual information and sexual habits stored in their xes memory, they like familiar sexual information, go deeper with it, and are less likely to try new things. Therefore, familiarity is very important to women. Furthermore, because women bind sex with their emotions, it becomes hard for a woman to imagine having sex with another man if she's already in love with her partner.

In addition, for a woman in a healthy state of mind, sex is just one of many means of love, so sexuality is not necessarily activated by her husband with whom she's already fully bonded. However, when a woman has an affair, she's not in love with her partner, but she's addicted to the attention he gives her. Attention addiction is not the same thing as love, so she feels constantly restless, constantly craving attention and activating her sexuality. It's important to keep in mind that there are so many myths about sex that deal with only what's on the surface, and almost none of them can be believed.

                          https://youtu.be/vqA6cGa7qHE?si=8oC-3mTWiKdej0Ov

             About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)

No comments:

Post a Comment

[Sex & Xes] If you want to get the best woman

  Men aren't actually interested in women with good hearts. They usually like women who have a pretty pretty, have a good body, and are ...