5/22/2021

After you divorce, you may be the mother and the father, but not the wife and the husband anymore.


 Q : It has been a year and 4 months since the divorce. I left home every weekend for 3 months in the process of divorce by agreement. Of course, I did my best to be a perfect mother on weekdays. Oh, I have three children to raise. My husband accuses me of having infidelity because of the 3 months that I left home every weekend. The youngest one is only 5 years old; the child keeps looking for the father. I asked him for a reunion because I cannot see my child missing the father anymore; however, he told me that our reunion is possible only if I can promise to be obedient to his family. He told me to come and beg for his and their forgiveness. Just for reference, his mother lives alone, and his two older brothers are divorced. 

A : Regardless of his suspicion, if you didn't have an extramarital affair, you are not guilty, but his suspicion on you having infidelity might be reasonable because you left home every weekend. Of course, you left home to get away from the difficulty, but your behavior might have been suspicious, making him thought that you were cheating on him.

https://youtu.be/fwlMQVtYHPM

However, it is also possible that your husband is the one having an inappropriate relationship with another woman. If it is true, there's no reason for him to reunite with you. He just needs you for raising children. 

The content needs to be organized, but whatever it is, if you are innocent, don't mind about him; his words saying that he will reunite with you if you become obedient to his family are all lie. It's just an excuse to avoid the reunion. He can make any excuses if he can avoid being with you. 

Moreover, if you divorced, his family is not your family-in-law anymore. When you and ex-husband meet, you two are just a man and a woman, not a husband and his wife. Because of children, you two can be a mother and a father but are not a husband and a wife anymore. You are trying to listen to him because you don't know how to deal with this situation. 

If a person's siblings have experiences of divorce, the person is more likely to divorce. It is highly contagious, stronger than you think. Also, your behavior of leaving home every weekend might have caused your husband to doubt your infidelity. If you treat yourself and recover, there is no reason for you to leave home every weekend anymore. You've lived well, rearing children; there is no reason for you to be accused like this. You must treat yourself and make the ability of happiness. If not, you will face more dangerous situations.



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