I have lived like trash and have done so many bad things in my life

 

A woman in her thirties consulted me a few years ago.

<Her question>

I have lived like trash and have done so many bad things in my life. I am so ashamed of my past behaviors and I don't want to repeat the mistakes any more. I know that I may not even be eligible for treatment after all I have done, but I thought, who knows, even a person like me might be able to recover and live a happy life. Do you think it is possible? Maybe I am asking too much? (She was extremely cautious in expressing her idea)

<My answer>

I don't have to know what kind of life you have lived. Your past experience is not important for treating your psychological disorder. It is only you who can decide on what your life was like based on your unique life experiences. No one else can judge on your life. All I need to know is that you want to treat yourself and live a happy life. All I can do is to guide you to treat your psychological disorder.

<Her question>

I am telling you again that I have been a very bad woman all my life. I can't believe that you don't have to know what kind of life I have had before starting treatment. How could you help me without knowing what kind of person I am? (She became a little aggressive and didn't seem to believe what I said)

<My answer>

There are many people who live like trash in the world. Some of them even think that they have no problem living that way. Human beings can make mistakes and can be bad.

It is only considered to be humane to realize your mistakes and try to correct and become happy again.

You have realized that your life has gone in the wrong direction and now you want to correct it. You are smart enough to try to treat your psychological disorder. Even after all you have done so far, you, as a human being like any other person, still have the right to recover and become happy again in a true sense. I can see that you have warm and beautiful heart deep inside you. I don't have to know the details of your past experiences. I will just do what I can do for you, which is to guide you to treat your psychological disorder and restore happiness.

*** Mehcanism of psychology treatment

Many people think that talking about and listening to the client's pain and suffering as well as providing attention and consolation are an important part of treatment process. However, empathizing and building rapport not only hinders the treatment of psychological disorders but also aggravates the psychological condition.

KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education) : http://www.uip.ac/

E-mail : uip@uip.ac