There are so many different responses husbands make when they are caught cheating depending on the husband's habits and the wife's response types. However, they can be categorized into roughly 10 different types.
1. Husbands who realize how wrong they were and truly ask for forgiveness.
2. Husbands who ask for forgiveness but do not realize how wrong they were.
3. Husbands who admit their wrongdoing but cannot stop infidelity.
4. Husbands who keep silence on the issue of their infidelity.
5. Husbands who continue infidelity secretly.
6. Husbands who blame the wife for their infidelity.
7. Husbands who display violent behaviors.
8. Husbands who leave home.
9. Husbands who overreact and turn on the wife.
10. Husbands who explain about their affair to the wife in detail.
Whatever type of behaviors they display, it is simply to avoid or remove stress they perceive from the situation. Husbands caught cheating perceive almost everything related with the wife as stress. Especially, when the wife expresses rage and anger interrogating, crying, or clinging, they sense extreme stress, which may be comparable to the pain of death.
Therefore, the wife should not judge the situation according to the husband's responses, believe what he says, put any meaning to his actions and words, or expect anything from him. The wife just needs to make efforts to treat her own condition of post traumatic stress as she would treat her physical illnesses when her body is sick.
The wife can set a new direction of her happiness and give the husband an opportunity to treat his condition only when she restores healthy psychology. She cannot live a happy life even if she divorces her husband if she still has to carry on with the condition of post traumatic stress inside her.
The wife must not be affected by any of the husband's responses upon the discovery of husband infidelity. She must treat post traumatic stress and build happiness ability before anything. Working to build her happiness in the future is not necessarily related with the husband.
When the wife does not treat her post traumatic stress and takes other practical measures such as suppressing her feelings and enduring the situation, trying to get even with the husband and the adulteress, taking counseling and coaching, developing dependency on medical care, filing lawsuits, or getting a divorce, her post traumatic stress may advance at a fast rate and she ends up living an unhappy life destroying her life and the life of her children. In the process, the husband's relationship addiction also deteriorates at a fast rate.
The couple do not nave to stay in marriage to be happy when infidelity occurs. However, the treatment of post traumatic stress must precede any discussion, judgment, or decision on the path of future life. When the wife's post traumatic stress is cured and she can live happily with children, any judgment and decision based on her healthy psychology will lead her to happiness.
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