[Mother Therapy] Choosing their own path and finding their own way

 

When do you get yourself immersed into tasks and do your best? Is it when you are told to do so or when you are expected to do so by other people? Probably not. We usually get ourselves readily immersed into the tasks when we do something because we really like it. Then, we can naturally develop abilities and become good at it.

Most parents want their teenage children to build skills and abilities they can use in their career when they become adults. Some parents may want their children to study hard for academic achievement for better future. Parents usually understand that skills and abilities they build in the teenage years may not lead them to succeed in the adulthood, but they still want their children to be good at what they do. Parents want children to build basic abilities at least, out of their own fear and the sense of uncertainty.

When children feel that they are forced or pressured to do something against their own will, they are naturally stressed and their performance level only goes down. They also become to relate the specific activity with stress as such incidents are repeated. On the other hand, when they get immersed into something because they like it, they may spend hours without realizing the pass of time and reinforce passion and happiness. They will relate the specific activity with happy feelings and achieve good results.

You may think that such positive cases are rare and we just have to do what we have to do to achieve things in reality. However, the fact is that children will naturally look for what they want and what they are good at when they have healthy and stable psychology under the protection and support of parents who also have healthy and stable psychology. They will make efforts to achieve their own goals without having to be forced or pressured. Of course, they will be active and do their best in whatever they choose to do and they can build good habits that can last for their whole life time by repeating this process throughout the teenage years. They will not be disappointed that much even when the result is not good enough since they did it because they liked it. Please, remember that parents’ role is to provide a safe and healthy environment where children can choose their own path and find their own way making trials and errors.

              https://youtu.be/vdvul0DuYMY?si=LvOV_1DMaySqv9X2

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