[Infidelity Therapy] Who is the real victim of infidelity?

Victimized spouses suffer from excruciating pain upon discovering spouse infidelity. They may think that they are damaged and betrayed by the spouse in infidelity. Then, the spouse in infidelity becomes a perpetrator and the victimized spouse becomes a victim. This idea leads to the conclusion that the victimized spouse can recover only when the spouse in infidelity is punished or asks for forgiveness. 

What would happen when the husband and the wife become a perpetrator and a victim? They may have to justify that they don't need each other and should end the marriage relationship. It is only natural that the family should be destroyed including children when the married couples are in perpetrator and victim relationship. This phenomenon results from the perspective that views infidelity as a practical problem. However, you will have a complete different idea when infidelity is viewed from the perspective of the operational mechanism of mind and psychology. 

Spouses in infidelity have developed relationship addiction, which is a psychological disorder. They may also have intermittent explosive disorder or hysteria. Victimized spouses has developed post traumatic stress, and remember all their life experiences as wounds in mimind. Spouses in infidelity may try to give victimized spouses comfort and pleasure, avoid the situation, or justify their behaviors, all of which stem from the attempt to achieve their own comfort and pleasure. 

Most efforts that seem desirable are likely to aggravate the condition of both parties. Then, they end up destroying their own lives as well as other's lives including children's lives. Victimized spouses may also try to help spouses in infidelity recover, give up on marriage and get immersed in other objects, or start a new life after divorce. Then, they end up pursuing only their own comfort and pleasure developing psychological disorders. It is crucial to understand that any practical measures and efforts only aggravate psychological conditions of people related with infidelity issue. 

Infidelity damages all people and all human relationships related with the issue including the person who has committed infidelity. Then, what can you do not to be damaged by infidelity? Spouses in infidelity must treat relationship addiction and restore happiness and the family. Then, they can protect their family and live happily with their spouses and children. Also, victimized spouses must treat post traumatic stress and restore happiness and family. Then, they can give spouses in infidelity an opportunity to treat relationship addiction. 

It is not only the victimized spouse who is damaged by spouse infidelity. It is everyone who is related with infidelity issue who is damaged by infidelity including even the spouse in infidelity. It is recommended that both the victimized spouse and the spouse in infidelity take KIP Treatment Program as soon as possible to restore happiness and family. 

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About KIP(Korea Institute of Psycho-education)