[Mother Therapy] Becoming good parents of teenagers

 

 What does it mean by being good parents? No one starts being parents with a perfect manual for how to raise children. Most parents just start parenting without a clear idea of what good parents are and how to become good parents. They may look for good parenting methods and read books about them. They many have some knowledge on good parenting but it is not easy to apply it in daily life.

      As children grow and become teenagers, parenting becomes harder since teenagers are in the phase of formation of self-identity and they seem to question everything they encounter in their life and look rebellious or difficult in parents’ eyes. Conflicts keep being intensified since teenage children and parents keep having arguments without understanding why they have conflicts in the first place. The list of points of conflicts is so long that parents and teenage children decide to stop communicating.

      Children from the age 5 to 13 are in the phase of adaptation to relationships and teenagers from 13 to 19 are in the phase of formation of self-identity. Teenagers form their own thought standards during teenage years through diverse experiences and trials and errors. When parents don’t understand the process of psychological development, both parents and children get confused and cannot but develop conflicts. Taking practical measures to correct children’s thoughts and behaviors to accord with parents’ thought standards will only aggravate the situation and some parents may give up on making efforts for good parenting.

      Children have the right to form healthy body and mind under the protection of parents, and parents have the responsibility to provide children with safe and nurturing environment. Parents must accurately understand the psychological development of children and guide them in the right direction even when children are in the late adolescence. Teenagers may look clumsy and awkward in many ways, but we just need to remember that they are still in the process of forming self-identity making all kinds of mistakes. Making mistakes and having diverse experiences will make them make less mistakes and be more adaptive in adult life. The first step of being good parents is to accurately understand children’s psychological development and provide safe and nurturing environment where teenagers can make trials and errors and form their own thought standards.

                             https://youtu.be/rcWveqTmYvg?si=v7Fjr6wlM6mbSmc3

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[Mother Therapy] Making trials and errors is not failure

 

    We all make many trials and errors during our life, but many people think that they have failed rather than they have made trials and errors, and give up. Making trials and errors is not failure. It is difficult and rare to set the goal and just reach the goal at one trial.

     For example, when you go on a diet, it cannot be said that you have succeeded in the diet just because you have reached the goal of losing a certain weight. You may have eaten less, taken supplements, and worked out for many hours a day for a few months. However, you will gain weight again as you eat more and stop working out. You may even gain more weight than when you first started the diet under the influence of the psychology of compensation.

     Reaching the goal of losing weight in a few months cannot be considered as a successful diet. You must be able to continue the lifestyle with healthy habits of eating and exercising. Then, all the previous experiences become the process of trials and errors. You may have experienced a few times of unsuccessful diet but eventually you have built healthy habits that fit your lifestyle. Despair and frustration that you go through in the whole process are necessary parts you cannot but deal with.

     The same process of trials and errors is necessary in parenting. You may have difficulties in the way but you will eventually succeed in raising your children in a healthy way as you keep making efforts. You should never give up on looking for the right parenting methods that suit your own situation. You must keep looking for your own parenting strategies based on accurate understanding of the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and children's psychological development.

     Parents make trials and errors since they are new in parenting. You will be able to apply your own parenting methods when you accurately understand what true happiness is for mothers and children.

                             https://youtu.be/KD3VtU_uU48?si=j6W-yNvaJF9s3BvJ

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[Mother Therapy] Right standards of parenting

 

    What did you think when your child was born? You may or may not remember, but you are most likely to have hoped your child will be healthy and happy all their life and to have thought you would do anything to help your child become healthy and happy. However, as you continue parenting for years and years and children grow, you may lose the initial resolution and begin to have more and more additional standards. Then, you feel frustrated and unhappy since all those standards cannot be met in parenting. 

     It is only natural that your standards of parenting can become different as time passes. However, when you put too much meaning to diverse standards of parenting, you will suffer from difficulties since you have so many things to manage and control. You may think that you and your children should be this way or that way and the number of rules keeps growing. You may feel frustrated and overwhelmed by the standards of parenting you have set up voluntarily when things don't go as you planned or expected.  

     At first, you have started only wishing that your child would become a healthy and happy person and it also made you happy. Then, you ended up adding one standard after another in parenting without even accurately understanding the developmental phases of child psychology. You naturally get stressed and develop wounds from parenting. You become irritable and get angry at children. You begin to think that your children have some problems. 

     Parents must accurately understand the developmental psychology of children and must adopt the right parenting strategies to be able to raise children in healthy ways. When you adopt parenting strategies based on only your own thought standards, you will necessarily develop stress and wounds in your mind, which in turn makes parenting even more difficult and causes conflicts in the parent-child relationship. Every parent should accurately understand developmental phases of child psychology and the characteristics of each phase. Then, you will find that parenting can be simple and quite enjoyable. 

     When you adopt the right parenting strategies, children will feel protected and nurtured, which makes their psychology stable and their thoughts and behaviors healthy. You don't have to set rules for each and every matter of children's life. You can encourage and wait for them to make trials and errors and find their goals and dreams for themselves. Accurately understanding the developmental process of psychology may look trivial but it can be of great help if you feel burdened with parenting. 

                       https://youtu.be/_XureLmRHvI?si=74mtuJnZYsEnh4GW

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[Mother Therapy] What is Mother Therapy?

 

Many people ask what they can achieve through taking Mother Therapy. In a nutshell, you can learn about mother's happiness and help your children generate happiness for themselves. Many people think and know that parenting strategies and parent-child relationships are important in child rearing. Parents willingly take lectures and read books about parenting. Then, why does the relationship with children become more and more difficult as time passes and parents and children become more and more distant from each other as they children grow? How come some intervention strategies make the situation worse?

     There can be three points to consider when parenting doesn't work as you have intended. First, the mother should understand what mother's happiness is. Mother's happiness comes from giving love and attention to children. It is the opposite from the mother asking children to do something for her, whatever the something is. However, many mothers misunderstand this point and have distorted idea of mother's happiness. The mother with distorted concept of mother's happiness may keep asking children to be compliant or do well at school, thinking that it will make her happy. Then, conflicts necessarily occur in parent-child relationship. Conflicts may increase as time passes. 

     Secondly, mothers need to keep making efforts in the right direction. They have to accurately understand the mechanism and apply the right parenting strategies. You don't have to discard all your habits and routines. You only have to add a few right strategies based on accurate understanding. You can go step by step without getting yourself and your children too stressed. You can form new habits of parenting and put them into practice. As you keep making efforts, you will find yourself and your children smiling and talking together sharing everything in daily life. 

     The third point is that every parenting is unique and every child is unique. Other parents' parenting methods may have worked for their children but may not work for you and your children. It is not recommended that you follow specific parenting methods that are supposed to be effective. You just need to accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and apply the right parenting strategies to suit your situation. You may make mistakes at first, but you can just keep working keeping the right standards in your mind.

     Mother Therapy guides mothers to adopt the right parenting methods that promote mother's happiness and children's happiness at the fundamental level. You will take Mind Training and do tasks getting feedback on your progress. Any mother can build the basis for happiness of mothers and children and apply it during daily interaction with children. You will apply your own unique parenting strategies based on accurate understanding of the operational mechanism of human mind. You will become happy as a mother, help your children flourish in a safe and nurturing environment, and naturally build good relationship with your children. 

                  https://youtu.be/S1_KNkDWLGI?si=-keQBxm73upqeyeW

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[Mother Therapy] Why do mothers worry about children?

 

     Mothers are always worried about their children. You may be worried about little things such as your child having skipped breakfast, not getting along well with friends, not doing school homework, and so on and so on. On top of that, mothers want to make sure every family member is healthy and well, and they also want to manage all the things that happen in the family properly. It is only natural for mothers to always think about their children and tend to have many worries about children's well being.          

     all mothers are women. Women consider present happiness more important than future happiness. They pursue present happiness and they feel that their future will be fine when they think they are happy at present. Of course, they think that they will not happy in the future when they feel unhappy at present. Thus, women tend to focus on everyday matter and become worried about little things that are happening at present, such as thier children skipping breakfast because they got up late. 

     On the other hand, men pursue future happiness. Men can deal with stress that happens at present as far as they have hope for the future. They don't think much of trivial problems that is happening at present. This can cause conflicts between women and men and the mother and the father in parenting. 

     The typical conversation between the mother and the father is like this. They mother says, “I am so worried about Tom. He watches his phone until so late at night.” Then, the father says, “boys at his age are all like that. You worry too much. He will be fine.” Then, the mother goes, “How could you take the matter so lightly? Aren't you worried about Tom at all? do you even care?” “Of course, I care. You are the one who is overreacting. Tom is a good kid. Why do you get angry at me?”      

     Mothers being worried about even little things about children and family indicates that they want to take good care of family. They activate their feelings more for their children than other people and it is sometimes manifested as being worried all the time.      However, when the mother becomes worried too much about children and develops anxiety, it affects all the family members negatively. 

      For example, when the daughter has an argument with a friend and just wants to stay alone for a while, the mother may become too anxious and express her worry to her daughter. She may say, “I am so worried about you. You shouldn't stay alone like this. It will make you feel worse.” Then, the daughter may stop telling the mother about what goes on in her life keeping the distance. 

     Worrying too much may lead you to develop anxiety, fear, doubts, and even obsession as well as conflicts among family members. Worrying about children as a mother is a natural phenomenon, but we should make sure we don't get immersed into worrying too much. If you feel that you are worried about your children all the time, you can reflect on the causes and develop your own coping strategies to manage your worries at a moderate level and maintain your family life with stability and happiness. 

                   https://youtu.be/TGHpMPFqq5w?si=9mk0LgS1sF1CCkrj

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[Mother Therapy] Is the stormy period of adolescence natural?

 

  What do you think when your teenage children argue for their own thoughts and you feel they have changed kind of in an undesirable way? You may think they are going through the stormy period of adolescence. Teenage years is the period of forming their own thought standards independently from their parents. Children who used to be so compliant with parents' ideas and guidance would begin to disagree with parents on every single issue. 

     Teenagers need to learn to form their own thought standards as a developmental phase of psychology. They naturally experience stress when their ideas and parents' ideas are different, and they would express their stress and different thought standards in quite clumsy ways. When parents just try to apply their own thought standards without understanding that teenagers need to learn to form their own thought standards, parents will assume that their children are simply going through the notorious period of adolescence, and conflicts may occur in parent-child relationship. 

     Parents should not neglect this situation or force their own thought standards against children's thought standards. Teenagers may not be fluent in expressing their thoughts and feelings and may look rebellious sometimes, but parents should understand that they are going through the necessary phase of psychological development. They are in the process of forming thought standards and their thought standards keep changing during the teenage years until they start self-actualization as adults. They will begin to take responsibility for all their actions when they become adults, but teenagers do not take full responsibility since they are still in the process of development through trials and errors. 

     Teenagers form thought standards through their knowledge and experience during teenage years. Both positive and negative experiences will influence their thought standards. When parents understand this process and provide the environment in which children can form healthy thought standards, they will develop the ability to incorporate even negative experiences into balanced and stable psychology. When they are deprived of such nurturing environment, they may be trapped in negative thought standards and continue to have unstable psychology even when they become adults. 

     The period of adolescence is important in both physical and psychological development. It is not right to viewing this period negatively for being rebellious or difficult. In the same vein, it is not right to justify teenagers' aggressive or disobliging behaviors thinking that it is only natural. Teenage years can and must be constructive and happy years of development when parents understand the mechanism of developmental phases and provide the nurturing environment for children to form healthy thought standards through trials and errors. 

                 https://youtu.be/0FJUI8iTCOE?si=bUVw3Fzdwf9V6Hjn

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[Mother Therapy] Qualifying conditions of parents

 

What would be qualifying conditions of parents so that they can nurture children's healthy growth? The most important one of them must be parents' stabilized psychology. We all know that children are greatly affected by parents. However, we don't think much about it as far as children don't display any problematic behaviors. 

     When parents have unstable psychology and negative perception of themselves and others, it affects not only themselves but also their children in negative ways. Parents' distorted psychology can even have destructive power over children's life. It must be noted that parents' psychological condition affect children much more than most people think. Children perceive parents' unstable psychology and are directly affected even when parents don't express their psychological condition overtly. 

     Not many parents know about parenting from the start, but all parents want to be good parents and help their children develop healthy body and mind. Parents' stable psychology is the most important condition for children's healthy growth. If parents have psychological problems, they must treat their condition before they do anything else. Then, they can naturally nurture their children in healthy ways. 

     Anyone can develop psychological problems during the course of life either by being affected by other people or by developing problems themselves. Realizing that they have psychological problems and properly addressing them is the first step for becoming good parents. All parents can and must restore healthy psychology if they have unstable psychology. All parents can and must examine their psychological condition and make efforts to maintain or achieve healthy psychology with strong will power for happiness of themselves and their children. 

                  https://youtu.be/hctkBShmO3U?si=sUAmNgffDpanI6DJ

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[Mother Therapy] Parenting strategies for the happiness of mothers and children

Parenting can be difficult usually for two reasons. One is that parents don't accurately understand the developmental phases of child psychology. It usually causes all different kinds of parent-child conflicts. Another is that parents hardly understand the difference between boys and girls in the operational mechanism of mind and psychology. Mothers must adopt different parenting strategies for boys and girls. 

You will find parenting fun and rewarding when you understand the two important points. Mother Therapy guides mothers to accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and adopt right parenting strategies for their children in specific ways. 

Every child goes through 4 phases of psychological development, which are quite different from conventional concept of psychological development. The first is the phase of survival, which applies to children up to the age of 5. They can develop healthy psychology as far as their survival is guaranteed in a safe environment. The second is the phase of the adaptation to relationships, which applies to children from the age of 5 to 12. They learn how to form and maintain relationships with people and form habits of relationships and habits of emotions. The third is the phase of the formation of self-identity, which applies to teenagers from the age of 13 to 19. they form unique self-identity and habits of thoughts based on their habits of survival, relationships, and emotions. Finally, they enter the phase of self-actualization as adults from the age of 20 and on. 

Parents, especially mothers, must accurately understand the developmental phases of psychology and adopt the right parenting strategies differently for boys and girls. Then, you will realize that your parenting strategies that you have adopted so far can be quite misleading and even detrimental to your child's healthy development. 

Your son is a boy and the mind of a male is operating in him regardless of age. Your daughter is a girl and the mind of a female is operating in her regardless of age. You can adopt the right parenting strategies when you accurately understand the operational mechanism of the mind of males and females. 

Of course, you must apply the right parenting strategies in the daily interactions with children. You will be able to develop unique parenting strategies that suit you and your children. Life is full of surprises and unexpected incidents and so is parenting. You cannot look up for information or ask for professional advice for every single incident that happens in your child's life. With Mother Therapy, you can develop the ability to adopt right parenting strategies for each and every daily situation. 

Many parents adopt parenting strategies based on their life experiences or conventional knowledge and information. When they have conflicts with children, they may think that their children have problems instead of examining their parenting strategies. Then, they may decide to neglect the problem or give up, which may lead to even more serious problems and conflicts. 

You should never blame yourself for not adopting the right parenting so far though. All you need to do is to accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and adopt right parenting strategies from today. Then, you will be able to achieve your happiness and also help your children become happy. 

                                                                       https://youtu.be/cca9lRl2MfQ

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[Mother Therapy] Parents who make children keep a distance from them.

 

Would you like to stay close to people who always talk about how hard their life is, who is self-contained, and who always grumble and complain? You may listen to them and encourage them a few times at first, but then you are likely to try to keep a distance from such people. You may decide to stay close to them when you have some important business with them, but it may be still very difficult for you. The same applies to the parent-child relationship. 

When parents always get irritated, only talk about their difficulties, and even speak ill of their spouse, children will not want to stay close to such parents. They may feel uncomfortable and discontented when such incidents go on and on and never stop. They will try to stand their parents when they have some specific and practical purposes of staying close to such parents, but such a relationship cannot be a happy and healthy one between parents and children. 

No parent would consciously want to have such an awkward and distorted relationship with children. All parents want to share happiness and laugh together with children staying close to each other. 

Especially, mothers may easily express their negative feelings toward children and family unconsciously when they have unstable psychology. They are trying to get attention and stabilize their psychology. It is a natural phenomenon of attempting to treat their psychological wounds according to the operational mechanism of women's mind, but it may cause children to keep a distance from them. 

Then, what can mothers do to keep a good relationship with children? When parents just try to be nice to children when they actually feel depressed and frustrated, it may result in other types of adverse effect in parent-child relationship. Parents may be misunderstood by children or they become even more distant from each other. 

The most important thing in this situation is for parents to accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology including different developmental phases of child psychology and right parenting strategies. Changing parents' attitudes and behaviors at the surface level will not solve any problem. 

As parents accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and keep making efforts in the right way, they can develop and stabilize healthy and happy expressions to be seen by everyone. Then, children will naturally feel comfortable and happy around parents and want to stay close to them. Parents don't have to make conscious efforts to keep their children close to them because staying close to each other becomes so natural to all family members. 

Parent-child relationship is one of the most important human relationships. All parents are recommended that they first understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology and apply it to improve their relationship with children at the fundamental level. 

https://youtu.be/zyIsC039rPg

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[Mother Therapy] Two important things to know in parenting

 

Every parent wants to be good at parenting and be on good terms with children. Two most important things for good parenting is to accurately understand the developmental phases of child psychology and to adopt right parenting strategies in daily interactions with children. As you stick to wrong parenting methods due to the ignorance of your child's developmental phases of psychology, both you and your child must suffer from relational conflicts and psychological problems. You may even give up parenting thinking that you cannot deal with the situation. 

You may not have heard of the idea that understanding the child's developmental phases of psychology for good parenting and a harmonious relationship with children. Most parents think that adopting whatever parenting strategies they know will help children develop healthy body and mind since they give love to children anyway. However, your own ideas on parenting may or may not be right for your children, which indicates that your parenting based on your ideas may not guarantee your child's healthy psychological growth. 

It is likely that you don't accurately understand the developmental phases of child psychology if you feel that you can't communicate and interact with your child as smoothly as before. You may feel distant from your child and think that your child has changed somehow. Then, you and your child may develop relational conflicts and suffer from psychological problems. It is imperative that parents should learn about children's developmental phases of psychology and adopt right parenting strategies. 

Children go through 3 developmental phases of psychology until they become adults. They are the phase of survival, the phase of adaptation to relationships, the phase of formation of identity. They enter the phase of self-actualization when they become adults. Children under the age 5 form psychological habits focusing on survival, children from the age of 5 to 12 on adaptation to relationships, and children over the age of 12 on formation of identity. Then, they begin to pursue self-actualization as adults based on habits of relationship, habits of emotions, and habits of thoughts they have formed so far. 

When parents don't understand children's developmental phases of psychology and right parenting strategies, they can't understand children's behaviors and their attempt to guide children in the right way is highly likely to backfire, which in turn may cause the parent to develop their own psychological problems.

 Parents can build their own unique parenting strategies when they accurately understand the fundamental mechanism of parenting. They can adopt the right parenting strategies that match their life styles and thought standards during daily interactions with children. Then, children and parents can naturally express their thoughts and feelings to each other and understand each other better. Children can grow in healthy ways in a safe environment parents have established. They learn how to control themselves and pursue what they aim for in healthy ways on their own under the protection of parents. It is actually quite easy to adopt right parenting strategies once you understand the two major components of parenting. 

 Some parents may be attracted to popular parenting strategies or parenting methods of famous people. However, every child and every parent are different and unique. You must develop your own unique parenting strategies for your own child who is also unique and special. Copying others' parenting strategies to raise your child may only cause problems since you can't apply your thought standards. 

Both parents and children naturally become happy when parents understand children's developmental phases of psychology and right parenting strategies. Parenting is supposed to make you not feel depressed or frustrated but feel happy. Any parent can learn about the two important points of parenting and make themselves and children happy.

 https://youtu.be/FrNRv_T1hjM

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[Mother Therapy] Mom, have you checked on yourself today?

 

Hello, everyone. I am Jin Hee Lee at Korea Institute of Psycho-education. Today, I will talk about how daily reflection on their condition can help mothers manage parenting. It applies to mothers more than to fathers since mothers are the center of family as a person who carries feelings that can affect everyone in the family. 

It is not to recommend that mothers must check on themselves for their problems. It is only to recommend that mothers can benefit greatly by examining on their own body and mind everyday to be able to maintain their own happiness and manage parenting effectively. 

You can check on your physical and psychological state everyday or every few days. You as a woman, a wife, and a mother have so many things to take care of and to deal with in daily life. You have to take care of your husband, children, career, house chores, and so on. Mothers naturally get stressed and wounded in spite of themselves, but they usually have no time to take care of themselves and reflect on how they are doing. 

Mothers keep checking on their children every moment. They check whether children had a good sleep, how they feel, whether they feel healthy, and even what food they ate at school. However, mothers tend to neglect how they are doing physically and psychologically everyday. 

When you are not healthy physically and psychologically, you cannot give others healthy attention and love. You may be doing your best in the conscious, but everything you do may be based on wounds, which makes both yourself and your family feel unstable and uncomfortable. You may become irritable and capricious. You may overreact on trivial things making family members feel nervous and avoid you. Stress and wounds may be accumulated inside you without being recognized and you may make negative expressions more and more as time passes. 

Mothers make all their efforts to raise their children in the best possible way within their capability. They look for information on parenting and study on child psychology. However, no good parenting method or strategy can work when mothers don't have healthy state of body and mind. Knowledge on parenting will have more adverse effects than when you don't have knowledge if mothers have psychological problems. Mothers' psychological condition is important since it affect children's psychology directly at the fundamental level. Reflecting on your condition is not only important for your children but also for yourself. 

It can never harm yourself and your family to have a short moment and check on your condition consciously just asking yourself if you are doing fine and if you are happy today staying with your children and living your own life. Mothers should take care of themselves before they can take care of their children. They should give themselves the same level of attention to themselves as well as to their children. 

If you find that you are in negative emotions now, you can look for ways to heal yourself such as having a quite moment to yourself or looking for practical ways to manage stressful situations. When you deal with negative emotions as they occur, you will not grow them until they become overwhelming and unmanageable. As you make it a habit to reflect on your condition as often as possible, you will be able to deal with problems as they occur. That is, you can protect yourself and your family easily and effectively. In this process, it is also important that mothers should not blame themselves for every little thing that occurs in the family or at work or get paranoid about every little negative feeling they experience. Just remember that mothers must be healthy and happy first for children to be healthy and happy. 

https://youtu.be/DVTh4Ls8Lww

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[Mother Therapy] Does absence of parents cause problems in children?

When children have psychological and behavioral problems, they are usually attributed to the absence of parents such as a single-parent family or a family with divorced or remarried parents. Would it be really that children develop problems more when they don't have both parents around them? Would they have less problems when they live with both parents? 

There can be many different types of family and it is not the structure of family but many other important factors that affect children's physical and psychological health. The most important factor is the care giver's role in parenting. Children may develop problems even when they live with both parents if parents don't have stable psychology or don't adopt right parenting strategies. 

How the care giver is interacting with children with what condition of psychology must be the focal point of assessing care giver-child relationship and children's problems. When parents suffer from their own psychological issues, they will naturally affect children negatively, and it is very difficult to adopt right parenting strategies. It may be manifested as diverse and seemingly unrelated problems of children at home and at school. Of course, both parents and children will experience all kinds of relational conflicts. Children will not develop problems if the primary care giver has healthy psychology and adopts right parenting strategies in daily interactions with children. The primary care giver may not be children's biological parent for children to grow in healthy ways physically and psychologically. 

Adults who play the role of the primary care giver must check for their own psychological condition before trying to deal with children's problems by taking practical measures. Then, they must check whether they are adopting right parenting strategies that accord with the children's developmental phase of psychology. Any parent goes through trials and errors and make mistakes during parenting, but they will not have big problems if they approach parenting always having the two principles checked as the most crucial reference points.

Many parents fight over children's problems blaming each other when problems occur. They may blame themselves or their marital status for children's problems. In many cases, they just cannot even figure out what is going on and what causes the problem, which in turn may aggravate the situation further. It is no one's fault and you just didn't accurately understand the fundamental mechanism of human mind and psychology. Every family member can be happy when parents or care givers restore healthy psychology and adopt right parenting strategies. 

https://youtu.be/Sqb-LhuhsL0

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[Mother Therapy] The first thing to do to restore parent-child relationship

Hello, everyone. I am Jin Hee Lee at Korea Institute of Psycho-education. Many parents feel that they used to be in a good relationship with children when they were younger but it is difficult to communicate with them as they grow. Would it be that the relationship suddenly became difficult? Probably not. There must have been signs of problems before difficult relationship started. It is likely that parents could not pay enough attention to children for different reasons for some time and their relationship became difficult gradually. 

Parents may not pay enough attention to children because they live together and always see each other. They may not even think much about children taking them for granted. However, they may realize that something went wrong only when they begin to find problems. Then, it usually takes time and efforts to restore the relationship. Therefore, it is important to pay attention all the time and prevent problems from taking place. 

When parents try to solve problems after they find then, it may be difficult since they have forgotten how to approach children after a long time of negligence. Also, children have grown and changed a lot because they keep growing, so as parents try parenting strategies they used to apply before, it may just aggravate the situation and their relationship with children. In this situation, parents are at a loss about what to do, may try this and that to no avail, and become frustrated. 

There is so much information on communication with children. It is easy to find such information, but it is not so easy to distinguish right parenting strategies from wrong parenting strategies. For example, you may try to praise children as much as possible learning that praising may improve your relationship with children. Of course, praising children can be good for your children, but you must first know how to praise about what depending on children's phase of psychological development. 

If you want to improve your relationship with children, you must understand their developmental phases of psychology and right parenting strategies. Also, you must interact with children in healthy ways in daily life. Then, you can achieve positive interactions and communications with children. 

Parent-child relationship is also a type of human relationship. You have to accurately understand the operational mechanism of human mind and psychology to improve any type of human relationship. You may give up on your effort and aggravate the situation when you don't apply the right method of parenting. It may take some time but you can and must help children grow in a safe environment and in a good relationship with parents. 

No parent would want to stay in a bad relationship with children. It is only natural that parents have difficulties in parenting and communicating with children as they grow older since it is their first time to be parents. You just have to keep making efforts to find the right and accurate methods that can be adopted in daily interactions with children. 

https://youtu.be/QE5L0QPSkJg

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